EMO

Date: 9th June 2010

Now listening to Eat you up by BOA.

I should be doing my work instead of slacking right now for the past few hours. Yet, I am now emoing and a lot of stuffs are running through my mind right now. What on earth am i doing?!!!
Sadly but true, I do think that i shall not trust people that easily anymore.
IT'S TIME FOR A CHANGE( FOR THE BETTER THAT IS FOR CERTAIN )
But the question is...
Will I be able to change for the better?
Probably not i guess

I think I am becoming more like her that she was last year.
Isit true that there is no such thing as 100% perfect in this world?
Can one ever get the best of two worlds?
How I wish i can ever do that.
Well,apparently not i think.

To me, everything has suddenly changed, for the worst...
I cannot help it but to feel pessimistic about everything.
Who can cheer me up?
Has anyone noticed about my change?
Drastic changes this year as compared to last year.

Maybe I'm undergoing meterphoresis or something...
Nah,i think "geographical isolation" would suits me more...

15/4/2010

Thursday 15th April 2010

I seemed to have undergone a roller coaster ride for the past 2 weeks or so.

Too much things have happened within this seemingly short period of time which disappoints me a lot. Too much in fact.

What am i supposed to do?

RUN AWAY FROM THE TRUTH?

OR SHOULD I TREAT IT ASIF I DON'T REALLY CARE?

This is so frustrating, i just cann't seem to figure it out somehow.

But there's something that i can confirm, that is the cruelity of the reality.

Probably it is just the hardcore truth where nothing can stop or prevent it.

Why everything seems to change so much recently?

So much until i could not believe the speed where by it is progressing.

Especially got to do with friendship.

Probably it is right that one should not place too much faith in friendship.

As you know, people change from time to time, not just physical appearance, but also, their own personality and values. The speed is amazingly fast that one could not realize about it.

But, that is just the truth , whether one like it or not.

I couldn't comprehend that no matter how hard i try to.

Why everything around me seems to evolve at such a fast pace????

Am i the only one that is being left behind?

Alone and yet defendless to the upcoming dangers/situations that i have to face with it alone?

Is it true that i'm the only one out of such complex,fast-paced world?

I hope not.

Seriously,i dun get it at all.

why one has to be so self-centred and yet put on a fake front to the others?

A highly invisible, yet defensive to all-mask.

where by no one could see it except for that person whom is trying all means to survive in harsh conditions,especially in a hyper competitive society.

Does one have to be so fake in order to survive & to backstab/forsake their close ones for the sake of the survival? Is it ever justified? Why is this phenomenon is so common anymore?

Does anyone ever thought of that?

Also,to think how difficult it is whereby one has to put on a fake front to his or her friends/relatives etc wherever he or she goes. Isn't it too tiring?

Sianzzzz

Omg. Today's date is 09/12/2009.
That is approximately 6 days after my last paper(Biology P1)
Well,it is great that examinations are finally over which is what most people are waiting for. But nevertheless,I would rather examinations are not yet finished:( Now,throughout the 6 days of freedom,i was practically slacking every single moment and this kind of lifestyle is definitely not my cup of tea. I would rather go work and spend my time earning some bucks & save for christmas, instead of slacking real badly at home.

Went to orchard & Raffles Place with yt today to seek out for job opportunities and at the RE(Ngee Ann City) there,u know who i saw?
Ivan!
Omg. I din really expect to see anyone from my school there.
not to mention him hahas;)
I was caught in surprise when i saw him sitting there,wearing tee and shorts,filling the form(which i did yesterday). We also saw another guy from yt's ctg, the one who is pretty welcomed by a number of girls in our school. I cannt rmb his name unfortunately:(

I talked to ivan for quite a while as he was asking info about the job agency etc....
I must admit that he's really really nice guy to talk too!;)

Me and yt walked damn long while searching for places which could be hiring pple like us.
I din even get to shop nia~~~
Unlike her,who brought 19.90 jeans which is totally awesome for the price and the quality.
Im so jealous!
*Thus,i must always rmb to bring a lot more next time round if i meet up with frenz!
I WANT TO BUY JEANS BADLY~~~~~~~~~~~~

On our way back(near khatib thr),i then realized that the one who is standing somewhr near me looks a bit like Cindy Yap. I was right about it. But only realized that when i was about to alight from the train. So, din get to talk to her that much:( Btw,she's working in Taka!

I WANT TO WORK!!!!!!!

anyway,im uploading pics we took long time ago(otherwise,she will kill me if i still dun)
Hahas

Here they are!!!!

Zy & Danny(aka Jay Chou)
*Someone's fav. photo;)

zy's stressed look(as usual) LOL

Another stressed kid(whom is thinking of jumpin' down the stairs?!)
*Dun worry,my dear,u at most get yaself injuried thats all;)
LOL

My fav. photo!!!!!

Durain!;)

Woohoo~
i love it~~~~~

Me & Umairah;)

Zy(again) Zzzzzz
*No offence

Random pic

Umairah & mE;)

Both of us again!

Zy(aka yi tiao yu)
LOL

in the morning came to school, chiong cse. wahh... i scared! if i get 21 out of 50 I will be happy enough. If got U, then... )': okay fine, I screwed up for the exam.

I will hang out with Hu Wei on Thursday, haha, we were like saying something, and he said I got talent, so can ... approximation of what Aj told me, its the same! But I don't believe you all xD I'm so gonna ask him to help me in my Calculus YAYNESS! :D

So, I was sad about my cse, Alicia helps me to forget about my cse sadness, by treating me Starbucks Mocha Frappucinoooo! :D THANK YOU SO MUCHHHH! :D Makes me happyyy!

Yeah, reminded me of the drink that Yj bought for me, the one with whipped cream and ice-cream on top. YUMMM ... Love both of them :D hehehe. Yes, today I shall chiong Math!

Looking forward to:

1. Cutting hair tomorrow

2. Buy Ly's present

3. Math Calculus revision

4. Help from Hu Wei! haha, probably it will be the last time I will see him until after A-Level finish ):

5. Next week's timetable!

Okay yesterday, went out with Eunice, eat at Breeks, then study. when we going home, she sent me home, under the block. i really appreciate that she wanted to have a lighter so she can light up the candle. THANK YOU :D

So today, me and Alicia was sitting at the Art Gallery. Rm came up and asked me if I want to eat or not. Well, I didn't bring money cuz I thought I wanted to just go home straight after my Chem paper. I just want to sleep. Okay anyway, so I told him that I never bring money, he told me that they will treat me! HAHAHA. Ok lor! So we went to Sakura cuz I told them I want Swenson or Seoul Garden, but I was just kidding. Wahh really, yeow jie is the best guy on earth! even though sometimes, he like don't care, like bo chup, but WOW, he rocks. At the restaurant, got this small card, indicating a few drinks. There's no tag price on it. Yj asked me, hey what drink you want? I treat you in addition. He's the kind of guy who always jokes around. So I was like, hmmm. got this drink, which looks tempting and delicious. I told him I want that drink. But I was just kidding la. I didn't know he was really treating me. So rm did the order. I went to the toilet for 10 minutes whoaaa, the food was already served. Then rm said the restaurant was empty cuz he booked the entire restaurant. LOLz. I saw yj was drinking his drink. I thought he drank the drink because he wanted to know my opinion what kind of drink is nice. So, the waiter brought me my drink. seriously, PUPIL DILATION. so me and yj had the drink.

I want to say thanks to clara, sheng wei, yeow jie and rui ming. (i close one eye). but really, people who really are nice, i will treat them nicely also. if not..., see the consequences :D

so, yesterday i dreamt about Mark. lol the dream was contributed by eunice! i dreamt that Mark sent me back home after he went shopping with me. i bought a white coloured bag, while he carried the bag for me. and someone else was dreaming about me (and another girls)

what i believe is that, when you are with someone for so long, that person will be regard as a "permanent resident" in your brain. so, when you dream about a particular situation, you will naturally dream about someone whom you are always with or always thinking about. and in someone's case, i think its because i'm used to be his confidante.

- thanks hu wei for the motivation. really appreciate it (:

Monday to Wednesday, school was pretty okay.

On Monday, uhh... I was very annoyed. My sec school friends aren't weird. They rocks, mind you. The funny thing, I was talking to yj, rm sort of interrupted me, I told him to "Shut up". Then, yj told me, "wahh... he angry with you". Second time, I told him to Shut up also cuz I was annoyed. He said, "I won't talk to you throughout my life". Then, I told him, "Fine! Then ........". And yj laughed!!! hahaha. What I said was a bit funny! I LIKE! :D

On Tuesday, haha, me, Aj and Adrian sat at the library basement during... uhh... =X wahhh i smsed yj 2 times, he finally called me! i asked him whether he's eating out, and with who. So, I came down to wed exp. I asked CH, "hey u guys don't have PW?" CH said, "don't have". AND I WAS LIKE, "WHAT? DON'T HAVE?! HUH WHYYYY????!!!!!!!!" I sort of flared up :D for a purpose. Ok phew, so it was me, yj and rm went off for our lunch outside WITHOUT ANY JUNIORS! :D We went to Breeks! YAY! $8 each la. so we had soup of the day, our chicken + fries + coleslaw!!!, small cup of plain water, and ice-cream!!! omg, the ice-cream was peppermint. my fav! :D so the three of us took peppermint. i tell you, i was smiling when i was eating. HA! i didn't finish up my fries cuz scared i will vomit. but luckily, i did not vomit. i thought rm wasn't going to talk to me, but he was the one who spoke to me first. ha! so after we ate, we paid, there $5.60 change. rm wanted to put 60cents for their tips. then i took the 60cents LOL. he forked out his own money to replace the 60 cents. and i took $2 from him cuz i need to buy ai ling's present afterwards. while walking to send yj off, rm told me, "why u want to take the 60 cents?" the reason was" I AM NOT WORKING. EVERY CENTS COUNTS. haha, yj agreed with me. THE FUNNY THING IS: rm said that he gives tips as a form of respect. so i laughed like some crazy girl. then i told him, "ehh you respect me or not? come, give me money!" LOL. so he rephrased that :D reached school, for pcct, released quite early. did my chem. waited for aj and adrian. went off to npoint. wanting to buy for ai ling a teddy bear. no money left. so we bought a flower instead. phew... we had enough money! :D

ahh i finally get the better picture after rosani and aj told me something. after promos, i have a HUGE project. i'm going to draw a "tree" YES!

they dumped her. she came to me. took my bfs. i'm annoyed. she dumped me. now i dumped her and my bfs. but my bfs will still live in my heart. that's why i told him that i am disappointed. in you. i will always be -.-'' whenever see someone with him. for goodness sake, do your pw. we, the seniors, we rockzzz.

Today, Saturday. It was raining. But I still went to Gal's house, buying Mark's potato chips. I managed to finish bio lecture notes, after 1 week! There's also no Wii, that's why. After that, I slacked. I was confused cuz SW didn't mention where to go for the lantern festival thing. Then I suggested to go to the basketball court there cuz there's a large scale event happening. Me, Eun, Mark and Gar left Gal's house at 9pm, after Gar managed to play the PlayStation, finally he managed to get level up. We waited the bus for so long. I told them we should take bus at first. Then waited for 10 minutes, the bus still haven't arrive. We decided to walk to the festival. Haha. My bad! It was quite fast walking there. When we arrived, we crossed the road and met rm, yj they all. After I introduced my sec school friends, I introduced rm and yj they all. Then, moment of awkwardness. Ok, my bad also I guess. I dunno what they all doing, sitting under the block? I thought we were going to watch the moon? Or play lantern? My sec school friends are all very ON, they have a lot of connections from North, South, East, West. But just now, its very awkward. I dunno why! Ok I accidentally grabbed Gar's arm, like ewwww. He shouted "Don't touch me!" Ewww, that's an accident! So, me, Eun, Mark and Gar crossed the road again and were "discussing". Sighhh ): Funny incident, Mark asked me to move forward, then he whispered into my ears, "That girl lining up at that ice-cream there, that's what I want". He told me before about this dream girl, and she fits perfectly. Hmph, Gar bullied my Eun! ): Eun rocks! She told me something that enlightens me, enables me to think carefully, I can finally see the light. I should just give up. She's right about it! I can finally study in peace now :D